As the fleet of Cosandeer ships began to arrive at their destination the tribe learned new information. First of all their elders had formed a compact that until all the ships had landed none should disembark.
Whether this was so that the first to disembark could not take the best land for themselves or that there would be an equal share of work to do no one on Deck Fourteen could say. What they could say was that it meant that, despite landing on a world with fresh air, clean water and a wind you could clean your soul with, the tribe were still locked in hard to their metal home, with too few bunks, too little room and only hard bread and soft cheese to eat.The second thing they learned was that of the five hundred and thirty-two ships that had left their world less than one hundred had made it through the Sodium Storm. More than eighty percent of their brothers and sisters had turned into nothing and only now did they learn of this.
Over lunch Payzar’s father told what remained of his family how lucky they were to survive. How it could all have been so different. Payzar simply asked his father “Do you believe Jambo was onboard the Alexos?”
His father turned mournful eyes upon his son and said “I know Kopec was with us. I know your mother was with us. I know I was here, right here on this bunk. Were you with us? That I don’t know.” And he returned to his hard bread with soft cheese, chewing slowly and respectfully.
On three occasions Payzar had tried to find a viewing port that was open but all had been shut. The Authority claimed that this had been part of the compact. That to open them would break the agreement the Elders had made. Payzar did not believe a word of it: why would it be part of the agreement that the tribe could not see their new home? What possible harm could it do?
Rumours slopped around the lower decks about the reason the viewing ports were not open and none of them were good. What was being hidden? What did the Elders not want them to see? What were they afraid of? Hot-heads prepared themselves to riot. The cool hands of Hadrian’s circle drew up plans to steal everything that was not nailed down.
Payzar really just wanted to gaze upon the Alexos, at last so close, but he understood the desire to feel sunlight once again. Real sunlight, that you only get when huddling close to a star and filtering its heat through an atmosphere. He’d like to see a new sky rather than the naked cold of space.
Hoji, Cano, Cannida and Payzar sat together eating the Kvetch sandwiches that Cano had made and drinking a hooch that Cannida said she had distilled, but Hoji said was clearly fuel siphoned from the ship’s tanks. Hoji was not old enough to drink so they made him hold his cup beneath the table where no one else could see.
“In a few short days I shall be a carpenter again. A real carpenter, who makes things, who does not simply talk.” Payzar smiled at his companions, and they smiled and nodded and sipped at their hooch. He slipped his sandwich into his pocket for later and closed his eyes.
Cano cleared her throat, “I suppose I shall become a philosopher again. Writing books few people read and discussing ideas fewer still will incorporate into their lives.”
“You don’t have to Cano.” Payzar laid a gentle hand upon hers. “You could work with me. I’m sure that after a time you could be a real carpenter. You all could.”
“Do you think Jambo would accept me?” she asked.
“No.” Payzar smiled. “Not a chance. But we could try it anyway. What about you Cannida?”
The tall woman shook her head. “I was born a gamble. The odds were always against me, but so far I’ve won every hand. Our journey was a gamble, one that many did not survive, but here we are. The dice came up in my favour again. My father always told me that, ‘if you’re on a winning streak don’t stop, keep those cards turning.’ Luck does not last forever. Why squander that on work?”
Hoji shrugged. “Maybe I could, but I haven’t finished school yet. And perhaps there are other things I could be. I may take up drink.” He took a crafty sip.
Payzar held his own cup between his hands and stared into the brew, watching a slick of rainbow coloured film drift across its surface.
Cano said, “Hoji’s not the only one with choices to make, who could take a whole number of paths. You could be whatever you wanted to be Payzar, live however you want to live.”
Payzar smiled. “I’m too old to change now.”
Hoji laughed, “You’re not even thirty!” Payzar was shocked for a moment then burst out laughing. He’d been carrying round this heavy stone for so long he had forgotten it was grief not age that had weighed him down.
Cannida said, “I know people treat you like an Elder, but I’m sure there are many years left to your span. Try not to live them all as an old man.”
It was then the klaxon sounded. Like a roar of rending metal, the signal that the ship was about to open, that their new lives were about to begin was here. Payzar was almost sick there and then; he clutched his stomach and pulled himself to his feet.
“I know!” Cannida shouted about the noise. “I know!”
The ships spilled out onto a fresh green world. Lush with plant life, insects and the occasional flying fish. This world reeked of life. As thousands of Cosandeers poured down ramps they cheered and whooped and cried out their hearts. “We’re here! We made it! This world is ours to make in our image!”
Payzar made his way slowly and painfully to the surface of the planet, the songs of his people driving him on even as he cursed Cannida and her revolting hooch. Across the plains he could see half a dozen more ships, each identical to the last, each as shining as the day they had left their homes. He turned and looked at their own craft. To think, he’d spent years inside that thing but had never really seen what it looked like from the outside.
Cannida waved to him from across the way. “Look! Payzar! Look!” Payzar whirled towards where the gambler was pointing, for a moment thinking she’d seen Jambo. Payzar shook his head, why would Cannida know what Jambo looked like? “Look!” Cannida said, now close enough to touch. “Trees.”
Payzar paused. “Trees?”
“Yes, Payzar. Trees. Trees mean wood. Wood means carpenters. You have your place in this world laid out before you. So many will have to fight to find a nook to shelter in, you’re ready to go and ten steps ahead.” Cannida slapped him on the back and took herself further down towards the trees, towards the distance lakes.
Payzar nodded. “Wood. Yes. That’s good.” He turned and found an officer, the insignia of the Authority painted across their chest. “Do you know which way it is to the Alexos?”
The officer shrugged, a barely concealed scowl on their face, disdain at being addressed at all, let alone questioned by someone from the lower decks. Payzar stood for a moment, an unaccustomed flare of rage turning his hands into fists. The officer did not even look at him as Payzar took one step forward, rash words on his lips.
“Actually,” the officer said, turning back to Payzar, “isn’t that it, there? With the blue and yellow markings on the tail? It’s been so long, but I think that’s right.”
Payzar almost fell, so caught off balance was he. He turned the stagger into a run and his fists into a wave of thanks. At first he had to take care running through the crowd, avoiding the excited people, but soon the press thinned until he was the furthest one out, running through long grass with thin yellow leaves that clung to his trousers.
Fairly soon it became clear to Payzar that the Alexos was not a short jog away, and he slowed his pace. He ran his hand through the heads of the grasses, he peered at the trees, gawping fish singing in their branches. He felt the wind stir against his face and the sun caress his skin with heat. As his mind slowed he began to feel the coolness of the air in his lungs. So clean. So fresh. As if it hadn’t been breathed a thousand times before. The wetness of the grass was so rich to his nostrils, he could taste it.
The slow ambling route he took drew him ever closer to the Alexos. First through fields, then across a patch of blue stinging flowers, each more spiky than the last. Their tiny cuts and clinging leaves brought an unbidden laugh to Payzar’s lips. The wildness of nature was like being plunged into a whirlpool after the hard metal and plastic of life onboard the ship.
At last he came to a wood and found himself picking a path through its shady glades and avenues, the beds of long-dry streams and the rows of unfamiliar species of trees.
With the shade, the late morning sun and the remains of Cannida’s hooch swimming round his head, Payzar was awfully tempted to stop. To rest a while. To nap beneath the branches of this new world. He ran his hand over his belly, feeling the twang of nerves, willing them down. He knew then why he wanted to stop, and it wasn’t tiredness or the desire to enjoy the day.
Stride after stride Payzar renewed his pace. “Get it done.” He demanded of himself. “Don’t stop. End it now.”
He knew it was impossible, he knew he’d been fooling himself all these years. Jambo wasn’t on board the Alexos. He never had been. He hadn’t wanted to leave. He hadn’t wanted to come. He’d rather die than leave the only home he’d ever known. And Payzar had abandoned him, left him there to face death alone. All that was left now was to confirm his cowardice. To confirm what he’d always known, his best friend, his only friend, was dead.
Even as Payzar snarled recriminations to himself, he left the wood and arrived among the people of the Alexos. Cosandeers everyone, dressed the same as him, who looked the same as him, but having travelled on a different ship, with no doubt different experiences. Had they rioted for food? Had they stolen the booze of the elite? Had they discussed the grains of wood and the mixing of veneer?
Payzar stopped. This was hopeless.
Amidst thousands of Cosandeers would he really find the ghost of his friend? Was this really the final moment of his journey?
The Cosandeers sang. For them it was all over. The times of hardship were done and the times of plenty just around the corner. And there, in the distance, Payzar saw him. And yes, in the distance he was running, running, running towards him through the crowds, calling through the tribe of Cosandeer.
“Jambo.” Payzar whispered.
“Jambo.” Payzar cried out, his voice cracking.
“Jambo!” Payzar screamed, Cosandeers stepping away from him, a path forming between the two friends and then they were entwined, wrapping themselves together. Payzar hugged his arms around his friend and buried his head in Jambo’s fur, tail thrashing, paws all over him, tongue on his face, barking, barking, barking his greeting for a friend he thought he’d lost forever.
Payzar fell to the floor, his dog dancing on top of him, twirling and whirling, racing away just so he could race back into Payzar’s arms again and again and again.
As the crowds lost interest and Payzar closed his eyes from tears, he felt a shy nuzzling at his pocket. Payzar sat up, wiped an arm across his face and smiled. “Of course, I forgot.” Reaching into his jacket he pulled out Cano’s Kvetch sandwich, and tore it in half.
Sitting, in silence, under an alien sun Payzar and Jambo shared that sandwich, their first together on this new world.